Editor's note: Lars did, indeed, return the MDF Bowl. Just not to me.
Let’s begin with the elephant in the room: Lars will not be
playing in the Turkey Bowl this year. While not having Lars to lock down that all-important
3-yard circle five yards or so past the line of scrimmage, on the downhill side
of the field, will be a difficult-enough challenge to overcome, the real
problem is that he won’t be bringing with him the passel of nephews who’ve been
the lifeblood of the Turkey Bowl for the past few years.
More egregious is that, as of this writing, he has not
arranged to return to the Most Dominant Force Bowl, so that it can be awarded
to this year’s outstanding player. That’s just poor form. However, without
Lars’ kith and kin, the MDF race is wide open. Can Michael Nulty step up to the
challenge with his Trubisky-esque ‘stache? Can Owen bounce back in his return from
injury? Can Kesin just show a little athleticism for once?
The BIG NEWS is that the Commissioner got engaged
in the off season! Kate Myers’ spirited-and-successful debut at last year’s Turkey Bowl (who can forget this wily rugby
vet’s willingness last year to lay her body out on the cold, hard Orchard Park
turf!) sealed the deal. The nuptials will take place over the summer in the
Finger Lakes. Stop by if you’re around. Dodger will be in the wedding party. If
you haven’t met Dodger yet, you’re missing out on one of the cutest dogs
around. Just ask Kate to see a picture. She might have one or two on her phone.
Speaking of cute dogs, the Nulty family just adopted Bea, a
deaf, 12-year-old shih-tzu.
Look at this picture. If you can identify everyone in the
picture, I’ll buy you a beer at Nulty’s Thanksgiving Party. I was able to
identify everyone except for one person. I also have no idea who the
photographer was. Kesin, perhaps, since he’s not in the picture? I would also
love an explanation for why I’m wearing that hat. Best guess is this picture is
from circa 1994, back in the tackle days. Everything in this picture reeks of
optimism. Why else would Nulty be wearing that outfit?
Most of the people in this picture haven’t played in the
Turkey Bowl in years, some more than twenty years. I used to get irritated when
I’d run into past players, like at a high school reunion, and the subject of
the Turkey Bowl would come up and they’d say, “Oh, are you still doing that
thing?” As if the Turkey Bowl can be reduced to a thing. But now I look at
pictures like this and I think about how great it is that we’ve had so many
people experience this great tradition over the years. I imagine that at least
one of these people, one of the ones whose names have been lost to history,
will be sitting at Thanksgiving this year and feel a twinge of nostalgia, or a
transitory pang of middle-aged pain, and remember fondly for a moment or two
their experience in the Turkey Bowl.
This year I’m not sure how the parents v children breakdown
will manifest itself. I’m pretty sure that the adults have gotten slower over
the last twelve months. I’m also pretty sure the children haven’t. The kids are
on a two-year winning streak, and while two is clearly in the fluke range, if
they win this year and make it three, I’m going to have to seriously consider
some rule changes to curtail their rampant cheating and loophole exploitation
to restore a competitive balance.
I got a panicked DM from Grampa Doug MacDonald this morning
explaining that Brian’s nephew is now 6-feet tall, wearing a size-13 shoe, and is
this the year we’re going to abandon the kids v parents model. Good question.
However, because I don’t know who’s going to be playing this year, I can’t
answer it right now. Like most good TB-related things, it will have to be a
game-time decision. However, I’m leaning towards keeping the rivalry going for
at least one more year, then we can call it “adults” vs kids and draw the line
appropriately.
While we’re looking at pictures, here’s one of the extremely
photogenic 2018 Crew:
This year will be the 37th edition of the Turkey
Bowl. There have been some lean years, where only six or eight people would
show up to play a half-hearted game mostly just so that we could say the tradition
continued for another year. There are 22 people in this picture, more than that
picture from 25-or-so years ago. That feels good.
I’m thankful for the place this game has in my life and for everyone
who plays, has played, has thought about playing, might one day play, watches, or
just worries about those playing or watching. I can’t think of anywhere else I’d
rather be on Thanksgiving morning at 10:30 a.m., than at Orchard Park, sharing
a cold beer and a warm Taylor Ham sandwich with people I love.
See you on Thursday!
